Not to be born white in Africa

The television will tell you
had you owned one
in 1975
when it came out
that being born white
in africa was quite simply
marvellous

heeltemal ongelooflik.  

but then we had the run of the place
of course

the only constant is change
change is what you make it

I’ve been voting for the wrong party ever since
and still can’t find the keys to my car in the dark
parkinglot

or any change for the dude
In his yellow bib vest, and blue ribbed overalls

who is digging trenches in the heat
for my fibreoptic cables

who is reading my smart meter
that is not very clever

whose kids are in the public schools
learning about chatgpt

who makes nightly rendezvous on the closed
circuit television cameras

I have positioned all along the outskirts of my property
that is bordered by electric fencing  

And an alarm system that is monitored
by a security service provider

his ghostly face quite white and clear in highdef HDMI
the very next morning while I

check the footage while drinking freshground fairtrade
coffee from ethiopia

Tapping out the story getting all the details down
the time what he was wearing the way his features

Almost shone, on my neighbourly whatsapp group
and wait for consolation, that free easy feeling

Of community. Of correctness. Of whiteness.     

Yes, we went to the polls with everyone
singing the songs of freedom
eventhough we did not know

The words – it was good for business, there are some
good ones in amongst the bad apples that are always

Shipped straight from Ceres to the americas
while we get the second rate rot from
shopritecheckers
sixty60.   

There was talk of reconciliation
and never any pogroms

In the highstake boardrooms owned by multinational
conglomerates of course

all the government parastatals
went to shit immediately, and we left in our droves

those that could
those of us who

had the unfortunate circumstance
of being born white in africa with

our british and european passports
hidden under our mattrasses like cold currency.

I switched allegiances many times
scoffing at the notion that I would naturally vote

DA. But who I was really voting for was not anc

That was the trick to remaining strategically optimistic
and radiantly newage to having black friends

Who would also braai on Saturday afternoons
and watch the Springboks win the rugby.

That was essential because the cricket was too white
still lying under the shroud of hansie how could he

Like the pot calling the kettle beset on all sides

The ossewaens outstaged at the river running
muddy and brown.

Back in the city, not the parts that are
overrun the metro police are stopping

Taxi drivers and letting the madams in
their SUVs go.

And the outfitters are falling over them
selves to shelf new oversized hiphop t-shirts

That make our teens look like they’re about
to mob and rob the local convenience stores

And we’re ok with that, we bop our heads to these new sounds
that come pounding through their closed bedroom doors

thinking about the metal they would almost
certainly be listening to

if this were only 1990 and things were
like they were. Back then. When

You know.

I’ve been studiously avoiding the more
obvious analogies afraid of being cancelled

Or too marginalised to any more give a shit
having seen my rightful retirement age slip

From 65 down to 55 down to 45
to get shown the door and I’m sitting in a gathering

There are two of us left and the lady speaker
has things in her hair and her outfit is sharp

And traditional and she is saying
And everyone is applauding

how the transformation targets
have almost been met     

and I’m wondering about my son
and how we worship entrepreneurs  

and how the guys at the bowling club catch water
from the government tap in large plastic holdalls

and take it in a requisitioned woollies trolley
and sell it down the road for 50c a cup.  

How the guy at the robot has a sign that says
Smile

As if we’re all on candid camera and it’s 1975
all over again except this time we’re watching

The Test Signal waiting for Leon Schuster to come on
and show us how to wear a mask.

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